Sunday, April 08, 2007

Good Sportsmanship?

(Note: Had another post up here earlier which I am editing. Got some bad news and fell off the wagon. Well, one step backwards, two steps forward. Forgive me. Now to the point>)

Sports have, for the most part, always been a man's domain. Football, basketball, soccer, hockey, boxing, lacrosse, whatever. That's not to say that there aren't women who love sports just as much as the guys, so it's wrong to make generalities. Hell, Magster loves football, boxing and hockey just as much as I do. More and more women are becoming involved in sports, both as competitors and fans. Why then, should it surprise anyone that some Gay folks love sports too? Why should anyone be surprised that a coach or player might be Gay? And why should it matter?

There has been much controversy over Gays in the military. I was in the military as many of you were. Did it really matter, when the shit hit the fan, who the guy next to you dated? Hell, no! As long as he had your back and did his best to get everyone out alive. Well, it's kinda the same thing with sports. In my mind anyway.

In short, a person's worth as a human being shouldn't have any more to do with their sexuality than the color of their skin or the way they choose or choose not, to worship.

Unfortunately, to some, it is all they need to know to make a value judgement of a fellow human being.

Recently, a number of prominent Gay athletes have come out of the closet. The reception has been less than enthusiastic by the "straight" community. So you can imagine the furor created when a Gay male College Lacrosse Coach decided to stop living a lie and be himself.

University Coach Comes Out of Closet
By ALAN SCHER ZAGIER, Associated Press writer

Sat Apr 7, 3:32 PM

COLUMBIA, Mo. - Frustrated Coach had nowhere else to turn. Alone with his secret, the college lacrosse coach sat down at his computer seeking others like himself: gay men who played and coached competitive, high-level sports but remained trapped in the closet.

"I am totally closeted, not married, totally gay and no one would guess," he wrote in an online chat room for gay athletes, coaches and fans. "My family, my team, my university and my career are not even remotely gay-friendly."

Over the next two years, Frustrated Coach revealed his hopes, fears and secrets with his trusted, but similarly anonymous peers on

The 33-year-old coach shared his regrets about pursuing "serial one-night stands" with strangers as he grappled with his identity.

He disclosed a recent bout with colon cancer. His upbringing in a fundamentalist Baptist church that scorned homosexuality. The emotional void he felt in hiding. How a psychologist urged him to date women to make sure he was truly gay. Alcohol binges he sought to dull the pain. The 24-hour involuntary commitment on suicide watch in a psychiatric hospital.

Gradually, the coach grew more comfortable in his own skin. On Halloween 2004, he told his parents, both devout Baptists and the children of missionaries.

The coach's parents were devastated. So were his older brother and sister. The family's youngest child was a sinner, an abomination in the eyes of God. Communication stopped.


I read the above article and frankly, it angered me. Why should this man, a fine Coach by all accounts, have to live with this? Why all the hate? Does the man perform his job well? Is he a good coach? These are the questions that should be considered, not who he sleeps with.

I can hear the Kristian Conservatives now. "Oh my God! It's Easter Sunday and he's posting about abominations!" Horseshit. It's Easter Sunday, the day Christ supposedly rose from the dead to show all of us that his sacrifice on Good Friday was not in vain. That there was redemption for all - including Gay people. And no, they don't have to deny their sexuality to be redeemed either. They are fine just the way they are. Unless, ofcourse you are willing to admit that the Creator made mistakes. I don't think so. Everything and everyone is here for a purpose, God's purpose, and unless you can see into the mind of God you can't possibly claim to know His plan. George Bush aside, ofcourse.

Here's the deal. Are some Gays perverts? Sure. The same holds true for straight folks too. Can a Gay person still have high moral standards? Absolutely. Coach Hawkins is no more liable to attempt to seduce one of his young Lacrosse players any more than a straight male Coach or teacher would try to seduce one of his young female players or students. Some may say that Coach Hawkins presents a "bad" role model. Wow! If that is the case the guy has a lot more power than any of the rest of us. I have had many gay friends in my time in the movie business and I can't recall one incident where associating with me turned one of them "straight"! Point is, people don't "choose" their sexuality, they are born with it. You can no more "turn" a straight person Gay than you can turn an elephant into a mouse, it just ain't gonna happen!

Thing is, Gay folks are just like us, same dreams, same fears, same goals; to live in peace with the partner of their choice. To prosper, perhaps raise a family. To enjoy what's left of the American Dream. (To that end, restoring the American Dream, they can be powerful, dedicated allies!)

I hope you read the article I linked to above. It will only be up for 30 days. Then I would ask you to e-mail the University of Missouri in support of Coach Hawkins.

It's Easter. Let's share the love.

University of Missouri.


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